Saturday, December 03, 2016

Checking in

I think I'm just gonna try to make this more like a journal, because I really, really want to have something creative to do or else my brain might explode. Okay. Let me know how it's going.

I feel kinda bad, I don't have any photos to share right now, maybe I'll add some some other time, if I keep this up at all.

So. Let me tell you about my day.

I woke up at like 10, because, well, I think I probably went to bed late last night. Yep, that's it. Because I was skyping my family and doing homework and stuff.

So, yeah. I woke up at like 10. Which in all honesty is pretty okay for a Saturday, right?

But then I just had such a useless day.

I spend all morning like, sitting in bed. I took a shower? I guess? But that doesn't count as a thing for me right now. Then I spent like 2 hours grocery shopping, because I'm stingy and went to like 4 separate stores to get the best prices.

Wow it took forever. So at least that let me check a whole bunch of stuff off my list, but I still have all this stuff taking up head space, you know? Like, all these little things that are constantly fighting to be my number-one priority.

So I couldn't focus, and I didn't really want to, and I just felt really crappy.

I watched a lot of Modern Family. Good show, by the way. It's one of those things where you can sort of start anywhere and feel pretty caught up within a couple minutes, and you don't really get too attached, like you don't necessarily feel the urge to marathon it, if that makes sense. It serves a unique purpose, and for me that purpose is when I need something to occupy my brain just enough. I guess that's everything's purpose though.

I got really tired around 5, but I stayed awake, so now I am wary of getting up lest I get tired again. I feel so trapped. If I don't do anything, I'll regret it, but if I get up and don't get tired or don't go to sleep, then I could end up staying up really late, and I don't want to stay up very late tonight because my days are better when I get up early. So now I'm just sitting in bed listening to music.

I made a lot of food, and I ate it, and I wasn't actually very hungry. I think I may be getting sick, which would actually make me feel better because then at least I have an excuse for feeling so funny.

And it means it's not going to last forever. Even though right now that's what it seems like.

Now I just feel pretty useless, because I spent all day around here, when I could have done all these fun things. It's quite annoying because I only want to do stuff in daylight, but daylight is so short.

And I feel like I can't enjoy myself until I have finished everything I need to get done, but I feel like I can't do the things I need to get done until... Monday? I guess? I'm not sure. Maybe I'm just procrastinating.

Yeah. I'm feeling off. Thank you. Check in again soon.

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